International Convention of Conspiracy Theorists Certain their President is an Alien

The Fourth International Convention of Conspiracy Theorists, meeting in the Hague, unanimously passed a resolution claiming that the President of the International Society of Conspiracy Theorists is an alien.  The President, Moon Hogwell, was unavailable for comment, though rumors that ran through the convention claimed that he had retired to his hotel room, concerned that the convention may actually be right, and if it were true, then he had no doubt that the government was behind it.

Meanwhile, representatives of various countries who backed the measure spoke out vigorously in support of the resolution, calling it a near certainty that Mr. Hogwell was from another planet.  "I mean," said Jotenheim Bruckner, a representative from Germany, "his name is 'Moon'.  Who but an alien has a name like that?"  When pressed, President Hogwell's press secretary only admitted that if the President was an alien, he most certainly was from a friendly planet that has no intention of invading earth and using its population as an alternate food source.  "At least not much," he said.

The European Union is looking into allegations that its central administration has been infiltrated by the first wave of invaders from the same world.  "We think it's that giant gas planet around Epsilon Eridani." said an unnamed government source attending the Convention, "but we're not certain."  We can only hope.